updates........

lolly jolly~

how ws my pwesentation?

it was so-so...x kena tibai truk and x kena compliment sgt...

so, emotionally, mira was feeling neutral~

after presentation, mira x tawu kenapa truz pengsan dead kat blik for hours and bangon2 je i had tiz crazy headache...and dlm condition yg x brapa sehat tu, i decide to go makan wit my man bcoz mira tersangat la lapar...and bole plak purse hilang...

nak mencarinya satu hal....tpi otak tgh sakit tahap max....so i end up kluar identity-less and wit empty pocket...(sorry wak..kena bayar for me) (>_<)n

haih...but luckily later i found out my purse tersekat kek colah kosi kete...(porrrdahhhh)

and exam gamelan plak....haih....x tawu nak ckp cmne...bole plak tersilap silup sana sini...pastu ader plak soalan theory...(satu hampeh ak x dapek jawab!)

wutever it is, now am happy at home with my family.... even tho mira realized a minute ago i have to get back to uia for ecd assignment plak...

when will this end?

the end

weird?

mmm...

is it weird klau mira a bit over dlm bab fulfilling people's expectations?

is it abnormal biler mira emo and paranoid even the smallest things people pointed out utterly unsatisfied about my work?

am i being ungrateful for behaving in such?

my explanation wud be....

i acted that way because i want everything i do to be in perfect shape! im a born perfectionist...!!!(highlight! in certain aspects)

so...sumtimes, mira a bit over react biler org nt quite happy with my work (even tiny bit of dissapointment area)...becoz that means 'its not enough'...and that means 'i have to do more'...and that means 'i sux'

i feel shit ass....

let see....hypothetical situation...

u do housework all day and suddenly ur mom came back home and she screams at u 'y are the chairs all dusty??!!!!'

u kno wat i mean?

rs mcm 'dem!!! cmne ak bole x nmpk habuk kat kosi satu tuhhh??? kosi tuuu jeee kowtt!! arghh!!! i suxxxx!!!!'

yess...mira mmg cmni....

so...today, i have learn my lesson.

1. respect other's opinion
2. its for ur own future good...dun take it negatively
3. be open minded and positive about everything...hanging urself with subjective comments arent gonna giv ya success...

mira x suke happy sgt on sumthing unless its totally muktamad...then ill do celebration...early satisfaction will only pushed u further down below....

and i have once put myself part of such behavior and when the muktamad stage came through, I wasnt entertain and its devastating experience....

cnfident sangat....sux....

p/s: kata2 utk diri sndiri

the end

final expression

finally intenet dah boley online...

and these are copied notes i wrote yesterday:

"ok...im sleepy and tired...

i tot my work was done...but the fact that i missed sumthin reaally important...

and when the mistakes was pin pointed, my inner perfectionism was in dilemma...

i cnt seem to ignore it, thus i decide to re-edit my finalized work...

its quite a job thre but im working really hard to make it in perfect shape...

i dun wanna end my part 1 feeling utterly disspaointed and knowing my capabilities are more than i have currently cherished...

yess..im imagining myself heaving a huge sigh of relief after putting the most effort onto sumthing

i might not get the chance to experience nemore...its very meaningful to me...and that memo was partially what pushes me to aquire such personal success...might not be good at people's perspective but

the least is i myself knw, i have done my very best...any pop and flaws will be fixed for future development....

humans..."

the end.

bebelan di rumah

salam~

aduh..these few days Tuhan mmg mencabar jiwa ragaku liao....sabar mira sabaaa....and dugaan tu bersilih ganti...x penah stop!

...adik dah nak balik mesir but i havent been spending much time with him...tu la org ckp, biler jaoh rindu biler dekat x endah pon....manusia2...

senanya rindu...serius rindu.....mmmm....salah mira la x penah nak selit those little time n opportunity to see you...im so sorry... :'(

after almost 3 weeks x balik rumah, at times like tiz where usually i wud be locking myself in my bubble and work till dead, im actually pop those bubbles and decide to go back home..mommy dah bising daaa.....

well...i tot it was a bloody bad idea at first, but spiritually, im feeling happier...theyve made my day...masalah dgn Miss K pon da settle...(indirectly we spoke normally)...a lil akward tho but its a progress...

mmm....well...sad news...

ayah ader medical checkup today...its once every 2 years...and.. :'(

yes...ayah sakit....

i hope everythin good wud happen...plz ayah...jga ur health pliz...we all love you~

and i juz found out that that pain ive always felt kt my chest was actually gastric....i knew one day i wud infect with such disease since skipping food has always been part of me...

(--__-)> now...im worrid...

p/s: i harder the stronger ive become....so..come on! im readyyy for yaaaa!!!! (>0<)O

the end

life competition

mmm...mood agak merudum malam ni...

pms season probably...<---lame ol female excuse for being so irrationally emotional all the time...

(--_-)> *admitting*

mira x ske compare diri dgn org laen in a bad way...cthnya...benda2 yg bole buat mira rasa jatuh....

'ehh...hebat giler dier...klau nak compare dgn aku yg lemah ni....'

serius x suke...

say wutever u wan but i might have that high pride ego tapi mira percaya smua benda dalam dunia ni...klau KAW bole buat....AKU pon boleeyh!!!!

Tuhan cipta manusia ni samer jer....apa yg bezakan kite is effort!

so juz pump up tht extra effort, ure a champion....

tpi kiter x bole deny sum people x payah nak put a lot of efort sgt tpi berjaya smpi ke bulan...org jenis mcm ni mira susah nak respect and i call them fake successor!!!!...fakers ni sebenarnya diuji Tuhan sejaoh maner dier bole handle nikmat 'senang berjaya' yg Tuhan dah kasi...

so kawan2...kiter x payah la nak jeles ke apa dgn org mcm ni...diorg antara yg diuji Tuhan jugak sebenarnya...

satu lg yg mira pantang is biler cnfident lacking...(shj mira x kisah...smua org ad perasaan x yakin tu)...ANDDDDD!!!! effort zero......

korg baek tanam diri sndiri laaaaaaaa!!!! dok bising ckp diri sndiri truk tpi ader x strive to make urself better?

klau xde...shaddap!

*emo*

anyways, my whole point is...mira bengang dgn diri sndiri becoz tonite, i almost got drown with self hatred...becoz of lumrah comparison syaitoooonnnnn tuh!

a message for myself:

u kno urself better...and whats important is, u have put a lot of effort into it...no more~

-the end-

makaaannnn!

saigo!!!! (>0<)O

ok...xde kena mengena....

mira rs kawan2 mira dah stat makan extra speed than they usually does... (kejar masa for work probably) (._.)/

and sejujur jujurnya!!!! im an extreme slow eater in reality...most of the time i fake it and force myself to speed eat...(and later i wud suffer stomach ache) >.<

becoz!!

mira x ske the fact these people are waiting for me...and i cn see it in their eyes

eyeball A: cpt la sikit minah oii...ak nak balik blik settlekan floor plan

eyeball b: cptttttttt!!!!

eyeball c: apahal la slow sgt makan ni...

me: (T-T)...tak sukeee.......

that is partially the reason y i skip eating...coz then..

1. people wont have to wait for me....
2. i wont have to face tht aching stomach pain aftrwards...
3. and i wont rugi anything for not having a proper personal eating tempo...



hmmmmmm....

second tot!

eating alone is no fun jgk...

i need a company who understands me and let me taste my food passionately without telly me on time and pressure....tht wud be my greatest eat spending moments....

so...awak...u kno me well...tq for those times u let me actually taste my food....

(^=^)> heee~

p/s: do u kno its not appropriate to leave the table while another person is still eating? come on people...thts basic table ethics... (--_-)

-the end-

sketchup

hey~

to be honest....mira benci org yg pakai sketchup buat keje ms 1st 2nd year dlu....org laen buat manual, dier nak advance awal lps tu senang2 je dier nak buat perspektif (trace)....so unfair...

benci giler....and the truth is im proud of those people yg buat manual n perspektif gempak nk mati...skill korg mmg aku tunduk a! R E S P E C T RESPECT!! (eyi ak x hebat)

however, biler da msk 3rd year...skill buat perspektif ku yg x seberapa + bodo giler sketchup = jiwa ak merana nak mati skrg....benci benci...hamek kaw!!!!!

padan muke mira....

p/s: tapi ak x menyesal dgn keje2 ak yg lepas...walaopon x seberapa, ak tawu keje tu dtg dr tgn/ otak 3D ak sendiri...bukannya sumber hebat dr teknologi komputer..... (peeeerrrghhhhH!!!!!!)

ow....ni satu keje sketchup ak yg ak rs mcm dah buat terbaek da tyme tu....

my family area

*post ini xde kena mengena dgn sesiapa....hanya utk luahan hati sndri*

the end

takooowtttt!!!

the most scariest thing juz happen to me tiz monin...

but i cnt tell ya details...

sumpah scary!!!!!

-the end-

mommy mommy

yo.

dah 2 minggu mira x balik rumah and msk ni minggu ke-3...

i kno...i kno...u muz be wondering asal mira x balik je...drive balik wud be less than 10 minutes klau speed 120...

well, im not the homey type. I like to live independent. I like to do a lot of things on my own. Kat rumah im basically in cage. I dun like it. The reason for me to be home is only to be with family. and to help mommy ayah out with something...

both my parents are working and diorg balik malam~ so, apa tujuan mira balik ptg even tho clas habes pkol 12 and the next day klas starts at 3...i will be swinging home alone kt rumah...its fairly sunyi and quiet, people.

I'd juz pass the option n prefer to be here instead...

and mira sgt pentingkan fokus. When im doin work, I hate stuff yg bole larikan fokus...like movies, facebook, blogging and i have to admit...rumah! coz rumah ader everything!

When i do my work, half of me are pushing extra hard sbb i kno lepas jer smua benda alah ni, i cn jolly molly at home, facebook, blog like crazy and layan movie 24 hours....

juz a lil bit of sacrifice makes the effort seems worthy.... (^-^)d

anyho...td mami came by uia and bwk food for me...*terharu*

i havent tasted mommy food for 2 weeks...sumpah rindu giler....muak aku makan makanan makcik asma'...(soory...my mom's cooking are wayyy better!!!!!!!)

serius...mira respect giler mami...she started cooking at 10 and she LOVES it!! so u cn imagine now...start cooking at tht young age and shes passionate about it mmg sedappp!!! klau kt rumah, everyday mami msk perfect set sgt sgt!!

so i have to admit, sumtimes im a lil spoilt with imperfection food serving.

BACK TO THE STORY!

i was so eksaited, mira tunjuk la sikit2 design progress....

me: mii!! tgk tgk design ngahhh...

mommy: kilang ke tuu???

me: (T-T)

p/s: im designing a bungalow house for prominent people for this final year

the end

randomness

sila click utk lihat lebey jeles....
mereka berdua eksaited tgk tuan diorg buat keje...HOW CUTE IS THAT PEOPLEEEE!!!!!!!!! *out of control*

bru tinggalkan diorg kt bilik 2 hari dah mesra mcm ni

pah (kiri), jang (kanan)

aksi superman pah! SO KIOTTtt!!!!


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...suke giler gamelan ok...suke giler...kt skolah dulu ketua gamelan.. mira maen smua instrument...(berlagak)... mira mmg giler gamelan time skola dlu tpi aftr tu dah x dpt nak main....seb baek la uia ad....ha? apa? beli? banyakkk cntikk!!! satu benda alah instrument ni pn cost beratus...(--_--")

*secretly sedih sbb klas skill dah nak habes*

(T-T)

(XXXXXXX!!!!)

the end

i feel.......

yuhu~

semalam i was kinda depress.

y?

mm...

penah x one moment u feel akwardly sedih and sensitive for no exact reason and at that point, even the smallest thing pon korg rs nak blame everything at it for how uve been feeling...

that has been my yesterday's experience. It was heart breaking. :'(...for no reason...so mcm...nak mintak simpati pn xde justification, org malas nak layan. probably tiz iz wat they call em mood swing attack.

u might known to be the most patient man but somehow, one moment, out of a sudden, smua benda nak marah.

Isnt it normal?

normal kan?

huuu...so basically semalam smua benda buat mira nangis. mata bengkak2 buat design. When im alone, mira x suke tahan air mata/sedih. Becoz it makes me feel worst inside. So prefer to LOL (lepaskan out loud)

y alone? sbb mira segan sebenarnya nangis depan org. I feel like an idiot when people see me cry..tak ke? huhu. Plus, i hate weaklings (weak+feeling). i wan people to see me as a strong person so automatically psikologi mira pn received positive aura from my surroundings....

heee~~~

anyho, aftr tht LOL, im feeling much much better the next day. cuma a lil exhausted. I woke up at 9 and mandi shampoo smua...pastu smbg buat keje but the weather seems to push me to sleep...(hujan je today kan?)

Mira rindu dgn someone tu. walaopn dekat, terasa jaoh je skrg. masing2 fokus dgn projek. mira paham. mira pn xnk kacaw dier n mood mira yg swinging sbb keje ni pn mcm merosakkan suasana je biler klua...so...after smua hectic finale ni end, we will dance together in the rain k wak? happy rain of coz~

tomorrow wil be our 7 months anniversary... (^-^)> syukur giler bertahan smpi skrg....luv u wak~

okok...mira wil stop bebel-ling...

p/s: nak msk 3 minggu x balik rumah....*sigh*

the end

anak encik taib smua cmni

yikes!

mmm...yesterday mira was burnin in rage with work becoz lack of skill. and cnt deny im a perfectionist. I wan everything to be perfect.

however yesterday's work has twitch my patience even tho afterwards I was spose to have a molly jolly date with my man~

Honestly, mira was excited to meet him! x tipu!!! but the work had caught me in despair n hilang mood! and in tht firing situation, people gave me wrong unsupportive advice and its breaking me apart!

haih~

kesian my dearest.

I dun blame u. it ws me. Im a hot temper bitch ass. U muz think mira being selfish. i jz hate comparing works with the unfortunates...it doesnt make me feel less worrid or even feelin superior among them...

i prefer admiring the best and trying to be like them. reachin the same goal. Feeling the same passion. putting the same amount of effort.

mmm..........determination.

p/s: 5 star utk cte 127 hours and unknown....do watch people! XD

the end

i loike

mornen people! XD

semalam cukup tido 7 hours and now im freshy freshiahh!! o(>o<)O

malam semalam mira had nightmares pasal family and bangon2 je terasa nak call everyone...mommy ayah hafiz.....emm...(sorg lg tu x sebut)

*lamer giler ak majuk*

anyways! mira wanna say tq tu my lil brother Rizwan Hafiz Taib yg rajin follow blog ku! mmmuuuahhhx! tapi kiter xde equal trade la adik. kamu slalu hangout dgn kawan n jrg2 je dgr kabar story kamu... :'( do call me when u free k~

ANOTHER THING ! ...u kno how mira giler dgn taylor swift...

(ina: buuuuu...buhsannnnn!!)

shaddap ina! (>0<)O

but now mcm da smpi tahap neutral...coz ive been listening to her songs for quite sum time now n now dah mcm..em...how to say tiz...bored?

(ina: HAHAHhahaha!)

(>-<)*

forget her....so...

i wanted to find a new idol....and yes.....im currently in love with her...!!!!!XXX))))))

INGRID MICHAELSON !!!!*suke gaya dierrrr!! suke sgt!!! I LOVE YOU INGRID!!* (>0<)O

and one of her song yg mira adore giler is 'You and I'
(i dedicate to u *wink2*)

don't you worry, there my honey we might not have any money

but we've got our love to pay the bills

maybe I think you're cute and funny,
maybe I wanna do what bunnies do with you,
if you know what I mean

Oh, let's get rich and buy our parents homes in the South of France
let's get rich and give everybody nice sweaters
and teach them how to dance
let's get rich and build our house on a mountain
making everybody look like ants
from way up there, you and I, you and I, you and I,

well you might be a bit confused
and you might be a little bit bruised
but baby how we spoon like no one else
so I will help you read those books
if you will soothe my worried looks
and we will put the lonesome on the shelf

oh let’s get rich and buy our parents homes in the South of France
let's get rich and give everybody nice sweaters
and teach them how to dance
let's get rich and build our house on a mountain
making everybody look like ants
from way up there you and I, you and I, you and I

(passst! best! SUKEEE!!)

the end

pumping!

yawdele hihuuu!!! XD

mmm...tgh letey giler sebenarnya ni and sleepy...

mira berjaga for 13 hours and afterwards tido for 3 hours je and now smbg balik alive...

call mommy td and she give me the usual advice.

'jaga diri'

btw, I havent been talking dgn K for a week...mommy n ayah dah stat risau and they had this plan nak suh kitorg berdua organize majlis makan2 for the family...

wat da!

all i kno is that i will never say sorry!

ego giler bukan?

mm...usually lama2, mira akan lupa pn pasal masalah ni...instead of trying to figure out how to settle things, id take the tidak risky way...

forgive (in heart) and forget (in mind)...pure individualistic beliefs!

ok...intenet uia xde for days..and finally! dah ada!!! yayaaayyy!!! i cn blog againnn!! (so i wont be talking with myself nemore!)

*loner*

im off!

the end

otoko de ongna

(=_+) *bru bangon tido*

nak merepek kejup boley?

mira slalu dengar lelaki kasi statement how pmpuan ni slalu buat benda ikot hati dan perasaan and x ikot otak/logik....but mira rs tht is not merely self wekness...

mira rs dunia lebey bergunung ganang, berbunga biler sesuatu situasi tu ditambah dgn hati dan perasaan,...baru dramatic...guys shudnt see us tht way...we juz wanna have some fun.

but some guys they take it too seeriously and buatkan satu sifat lumrah wanita tu mcm satu major undermining weakness...well, its not.

apa pon, i still stick to my belief yg masing2 compliment each other...

p/s: Tuhan cipta manusia ni penuh adil...x kira la lain jantina pon...so x pyh la jatuh2 kan sesuatu kaum tu as if korg anak Adam ni perfect giler...kan?

but when i personally venture through people. there r gurls in guys and there r guys n gurls...korg sme jeee! XD

colgate

alkisah...

mira tgh pegang a plate of nasi ayam with sup panas (PANAS GILER)..

and i was hoping towards my table and suddenly terdengar suara org nyanyi kt tv...

omfg! AMERICAN IDOL!

*turn head like the speed of light*

and yes...u cn gez wat happen...

that boiling soup tumpah kt my hand....

time tu mira rs cm nak cmpk the whole the thing kt lantai tapi pikirkan perut yg lapa ni mira tahaannnnnn jerrrr walaopon tangan dah rs mcm terbakar..!!!!!

larrriii g kt mejaaaa....put down the plate nicely....screammmm mcm org gilaaaaa!!!!

ham: G CUCIIIII!!!

*lariii g cuciii*

psssssssttttt........ahhhhh.....legaaaaa....

tangan mira berdenyut and a small part bengkak biru.. (SAKIT!!)

(T_T)n

ina ham suggest letak colgate...



then balik blik truz letak and now da x sakit but the swollen part stil ad....

nasib baik kena sikit jer kt tangan...

clumziehhh!!

the end

orang

dlm graphic drawings, mira slalu sux ass when it comes to human figure.

sumpah sux giler...

even org sketchy remp-it pon x menarik hati...(personal opinion)

...but yesterday..i decide tu tiru someone ni punya figure drawing sgt cute!

gumup2..montel2...fluffy gitu....



and i love it~

(psst! jgn mara)

the end

ckp kosong

hawdy~

ok..otak tgh blur giler skrg...yg ader juggling in my head rite now is design design design...

mira x saba nak end semester niiii...seriusly...but klau bole nak end it with flying colors....fikir2 balik...selama mira hidop as an architecture student...bnyk dah pengalaman projek...

bila mira buat design kali ni, otak mcm tertekan sket fikir final...

ini adalah designmu yg terakhirrr!!!! wohh! those words seems to haunt me all the timee..

shaddapp!! (>o<)O

mmm....im gonna miss all this later...seriusly....skrg pn dah terasa kerinduan tu...every second of it seems to pass by me like a flying dust bunnie...flowing thru the wind...even when i try to stop it with my bare hands, it curls through my fingers and cntinue to pass....

*sigh*

stopping the time wont do any good pown...so might as well juz cherish the moment now and make the best memory out of it!

kan? kan?

klau bole dah klua uia nnti jgn la x cntct lgsg...3 years guys..thts a bloody friendship weve built...jgn la sia2 kan satu pertalian tu...

mira agak kecewa dgn satu sahabat ni...she dont do bonding/atach aftr schools. so, terpisah mcm tu jer...and she dun even mind...

dier even said, aftr uia ni mungkin A akan lost cntct dgn mira jgk....

kenapa kena mcm tu?

friendship ni bukannya mcm brg...biler perlu, beli....bila dah x perlu, buang...

mmm...haih...kdg2, perbezaan didikan ni membentuk manusia dlm pelbagai shape and square.....and some mira rasa mcm....

WEY BENDA TU SGT BASIC ETHIC TAKKAN TAK SENSITIF LANGSUNG?!

...kena wise la plih member.....kan?

the end